Corona Update #7

This last week felt llllooonnnng and HEAVY.

We have been quarantined since March 13th ... and the loving feeling is gone. I found this article that really hit the nail on the head.

We don't have adult kids but the 4 of us just need time away from each other. Tyson and I had a pretty rough talk this morning ... and it's better but sad that we are just feeling a need to separate at least for a few minutes. It feels like the only "me" time we get is when we are sleeping. I am noticing that I am going to bed between 9 - 930 in order to wake up at 530. Still some days it does not feel like enough - the emotionally weight can be felt all over our bodies.

Tyson also felt the need to shave his head. Yup - he did it. I hate it but I also think it's good for Tyson to try something new.

This weekend we really went through all his childhood and mission stuff. We are really paring down to only the things that he absolutely loves. We will scan a bunch of things in and have his photos digitized.

Some days it feel like the walls are falling in .... and I am not rising up to the challenge - but I am crumbling like. a cookie. Homeschooling London has really proven to be hard. It's not that the items we are teaching are hard - but more that London is not motivated and fights us on everything.

Our saving grace is that we are still meeting with Ellie twice a week and at least she is slowly making progress on reading. Yesterday London read to me for 20 minutes and although they were easy books - she did not cry or yell at me - which was a big step.

Here is the article ...

Corona Cranky

Yup. It’s official. We are corona cranky.

Things weren’t this bad in the beginning. Maybe, for a little while at least, it was even nice to have a staycation. And some family bonding time.

But friends, that ship has sailed. Like to the middle of the ocean. We are now in the "I’m-hiding-in-my-room-to-be-alone" phase.

My middle son, who is 23, joined us for quarantine from the city where he lives in a cute but small studio apartment. At first he kept saying things like “there’s so much room here” about our house. But apparently, over the five weeks he’s been home our house got a lot smaller. Or maybe, because we’ve all been eating a lot, we’ve gotten bigger. In any event, he started complaining about a lack of “privacy and personal space.” 

After 28 plus years of full-time parenting, this was supposed to be my year of the empty nest. Having unhappy young adults back home was not in my plan either. And you don’t hear me complaining about it, do you??? Okay, yes you do. But at least I’m self-aware.

If this is some social experiment I’m failing. Miserably. Despite trying to exercise and write and zoom this and that, I’m still depressed and anxious. I sometimes feel as if I’m going to lose my mind.

Here’s the part where I say how grateful I am that we are healthy. And I am. Truly. More than I can express. And I’m grateful that we have food to eat. I cry when I watch the news and see how people are waiting on food lines for three hours to feed their families. It makes me so sad which makes me even more cranky.

People who are alone are cranky because they are lonely. People who are living together are cranky—because, let’s face it, we are not meant to spend 24/7 with ANYONE unless you’re on a honeymoon on a tropical island. Which we are definitely not because I don’t have a drink in my hand with an umbrella in it or sand between my toes. Just dirt because I haven’t swept today. Not to mention the fact that honeymoons last a week or two and not the thousand years we've been in quarantine.

Domestic violence and divorces are up which I totally believe. People are scared and frustrated while being cooped up. Not a good combo for being zen.

So how do we get uncranky? I have no friggin idea!!! Maybe we try and laugh and stay away from each other when we need to. Maybe we make a schedule and only allow one person at a time to be cranky. I’m open to suggestions.

I just want you to know that if you are cranky and finding this all really difficult you’re not alone. You have a whole planet full of company. Don't be fooled by people posting pics of their family cooking together or playing games; trust me, they are cranky too.

Let’s all take a deep breath and try and say something nice to our fellow prisoners. Maybe just maybe, it will make us all a little less cranky.
Thank you Thoughts From Aisle 4

Easter 2020 - Corona update

Easter this year was very different. It was really relaxed but we kept some traditions the same. 

The days leading up were filled with homeschool, great weather and lots of bike rides outside, Google calls with both Sydney's and London's classes. 

We finished week 3 of the lockdown. We have new routines and for the most part we are doing ok. I can't say we are "thriving" but for the most part we are living every day with intention. 

Some days feel very heavy. Mentally and emotionally I go up and down. The days that I can be outside, active - honestly life feels pretty great. On days that are gloomy - it feels like the walls are caving in. 

Honestly, the girls have been doing good - but I know they carry all this in a different way. If we stick to a routine, we can usually go most of the day without tears. London is a tougher case. She wants to spend all day on the iPad. She struggles with school but at the same time does not like help.

Sydney honestly does really well - but she misses playing with friends. We have tried Zoom playdates - but they are not the same. I try to keep them outside but unless I am out there - they won't go. 

Work has been slowing down. Two of my clients are really really down. Basically 90% of their business is gone. Leslie and Pat are actually about the same. We have our Conquer Launch coming up this week - and we have no idea what it will look like. 

In some ways - work is slower which I really need right now. 

On the other hand we are trying to pivot every - all the messaging and all the strategies - and it feels so heavy. 

Some days I feel like I just want to learn something new with this "downtime" and other days I feel like just getting out of bed is too much. 

Tyson has been working more hours ... his company cut salaries for anyone making more than 100K. So it should NOT affect Tyson but his paychecks were less this last time. Still we are grateful we are both bringing in income. 

The church at home has become really nice. We have a nice routine down. The girls no longer whine about it. The spirit can be felt. We have taken part into both fast that the  Prophet has invited us to. Both times it's been really neat. 

For Easter we hid eggs, did church, ate ham, put food in a bag for the missionaries, watched a movie. 

Tyson has been going through his missionary stuff. Hopefull he will be able to minimize the 3 boxes he has. 

*** London has lost her first tooth - she pulled out HERSELF during a bike ride

*** Sydney has now lost 2 teeth in the last month

*** We colored eggs 

*** Tyson and I continue to walk/run/ride bikes when we can

*** Tyson has been going out on Friday mornings (6:30) to get into line to get into Walmart and get food. We are still missing clorox wipes and Bleach but besides that we are doing ok on food.