Parents visit

My parents came in for a visit January 1-5. It was a great time. With Sydney getting bigger both mom and Fredy interact more and everyone love it.  Sydney really took a liking to Fredy and it was "papa papa papa" all the time. He was so patient. He insisted on putting both girls in the car and was such a protective grandpa.

Wednesday we stayed at home, Thursday we hit the children's museum, friday we spent three hours at ikea, Saturday we stayed home but got a sitter and had the most Wonderful time eating at Que Bueno. We loved the mariachi band and the food was awesome. After dinner we went to Barnes and Noble and had hot cocoa and relaxed. 

This visit was different in that we did not have any projects to do so we could relax. My mom was pretty awesome and played with the girls, pushed them in their little car, read to them, rocked them In The rocking chair. This was a new thing for her and she was wonderful. 

Thank heavens I got better and no one got sick. Tyson woke up with a headache. 

New Year's Eve

This years New Year's Eve was really boring. We were invited to a party at the smiths but Tyson did not want me to go out. So we stayed in. We put the girls down and I went to Panda Express and shared a meal. We stayed and watched some TV. We went upstairs and wrote down our goals. My goals for this year are so simple. I want to be keep up my simplified goals and I wrote goals that I can keep - like walking three times a week, read scriptures twice a week, read to the girls, read 5 books. I've come to realize that this season will not move any faster by filling it up with things that make me a stress mom. So I'm not. I'm so greatefuk for 2013 - although it was a hard year in many ways.  London joining our family has changed our life's and great ways but I'll be the first to admit how much I struggled for months and months.

The Lord taught me that some seasons are hard and they don't get easier quickly- but having  good community and a faithful spouse can get you through it. 

We have a lot of good and worthy goals for 2014. We want things to change and we are working toward that. God willing things will turn around for us but if not, we will continue to fight and think and be grateful for what we do have - which is a lot. 

Goodbye 2013

Welcome 2014. 

Please be good to us. 

Today

Still wearing the mask and getting slowly better. Fever is gone but coughing hurts my lungs. Today Sydney has been very emotional and I'm sure my patience is low due to feeling crummy. I put on her Leap Frog video on Netflix after dinner and she got SO excited with the letter E. 

Do you love her little hand on my leg? Almost like saying "gotcha"

Pneumonia

Christmas Day I woke up and just felt off. My throat hurt - although that had happened for weeks. I took Tylenol and musinex and began our day. By 2 I was super sick. I almost canceled our party but I took medicine and felt better. Thursday I woke up worse. My tempeture was 102. I took more medicine and braced for the day since Ty had to work. The day was pretty bad. The girls took a bubble bath, played Legos and watched more tv than I even remember. We all took naps at 2. I woke up at 4 with a temp of 103.5. I could not even move. I panicked and called Ty and friends trying to get relief Tyson came home at 530. Jay Bugarin showed up with dinner and a blessing. By the time they gave me a blessing I was at 104.2 degrees fever. Ty took over and fed the girls. I ate chicken noodle soup and laid on the couch. We packed the girls and headed for the insta care. On the way there my stomach started to really hurt. They took me right in but then told me to go to the ER because of stomach pain.

We headed to the ER. Ty dropped me off and took the girls home. I waited about 20 and they took me in. Took blood and vitals and hooked me up to saline. They accidentally kept my turnikit on so my ivy hurt pretty bad. After 2 hours they said I got pneumonia. The first thing that hit me was the girls. They gave me medicine and antibiotics for the infection. They also gave me mask to wear at home. We got home at 945 and saw that Elissa smith was amazing. Not only did she watch the girls but cleaned my house which was a total disaster! Amazing!!!  We started the cleaning process. We scrubbed downstairs and cleaned every toy. This morning we started washing all the bedding and kept the girls away from me. Tyson was amazing and let me stay in bed. The doctors put me on antibiotics for 7 days but said after 48 hours I won't be contagious. 

It's been a crazy year for health. From giving birth to London getting rsv to pneumonia. Crazy year for sure. So glad for healthy bodies.

Christmas Letter

For christmas Tyson wrote me one his amazing notes. I really just love them so I'm putting it in  my blog. 

Christmas 2013

Honey,

For Christmas I wanted to write you a note. I have thought about you a lot this month and during my late night escapades. J Staying at home is very difficult and I noticed that it can really take a toll on a mother. Especially a mother (like you) that is so focused on her children and not just having the babysitter named Tu-be baby sit. You really put all the effort in to help our girls get the best out of life. Here are things I have noticed.

Yesterday when I went out with Sydney. She kept telling me, come on dad. Come on. While she keeps wanting to show me the world she has explored. (the side of the house). But to her it is a enormous exciting world. Some times I get so selfish and worry about Sydney getting cold or that I won’t enjoy it or that it is a chore; that I miss out on all the wonderful things you do to teach our children, and how much they learn from it. You are an amazing mother! I know you told Sarah and Jay that you feel like you push me some times and maybe a little too much some times. Well, truth be told I NEED IT SOMETIMES because I am such a little stubborn 13 year old sometimes. I am not sure why you feel bad for this, when I should be the one that should feel bad because you are trying to help me enjoy my children and the experiences you have had from doing these activities from it. I promise I will try harder to not have you push me to do these things. 

I love how much you read to the girls. I don’t see really any kids that go up to their parents and ask to read a book and both our girls will sit and listen to you read a book. I love when Sydney gets so excited when you read Pete the Cat and Sydney dances to it. That she has lines memorized out of the book.  That Sydney picks out books and brings them to us to read and says, again! I love that. I love how London will just sit in your lap and listen to you read as she rocks back and forth as your doing so. I hope you know that through our children I see the hard work and effort that you put in to educate them.

I love that you teach them every day things like cleaning up their plate, their toys they have down, cleaning up their mess if they spill! Sydney the other day spilled water. Went right to the wash rag drawer picked it up and tried her best to clean up the water that spilt! I was shocked and amazed. I was like, wow. Mom worked hard on you for that one to happen. I love her dancing like a ballerina! Hahaha… I can see you aren’t afraid to show our girls not to be afraid and to express themselves! I think it is hilarious that Sydney throws away their own diapers (that’s my favorite.) I love it that my girls love their mom. That they know who she is. I am alright being #2 when I know the effort, work, motivation, and energy you put in to them. You deserve the attention and hugs they give you. They respect you and love you so much and I expect nothing less.

I am glad you are brave with our kids and aren’t scared to let them grow and learn. I think London is going to choke every time you feed her. And she jugs away! I am amazed at how well she can pick things up and put them in her mouth so well. I love it when she looks for you frantically, and when she finally finds you she gives a funny laugh and a great big smile. Even salivates sometimes because she can’t contain her joy inside. She loves her moma!

I love how you protect our girls. A lot of people may think that your to strict or that your too uptight about having a schedule. But you care not about what others think. But more what is best for my child. That is one of my weakness’s and one of the strengths that I love best about you. You don’t care what other people think. You care about the lively hood of your children and what is in their best interest. You are not selfish, materialistic, but loving and wise. Sydney and London are so lucky that you are their mother. And so lucky that you like them!

I wanted to say thank you for this Christmas and feel bad that I didn’t get you much this year. I do have one more surprise. It is very small though. 2 month free subscription of Hulu plus! J Told you it wasn’t anything big! We just have to make sure that we cancel the subscription on Feb 24^th 2014.

Anyways like I was saying. I really appreciate you allowing me to build the computer I have been wanting for several years. I have really enjoyed building it and making it as user friendly for you as possible.

Honey, I really love going on dates with you. When we go out without the girls, I feel like I can concentrate on you and it feels like we are dating again. I love to hold your hand and listen to you talk. It is different when we go out and my focus is redirected on you. I am hoping for several other dates this coming year and to see how we grow. I know I would not be successful without you and your support.  I am excited for a new year and for the success we will have.

P.s. 10 things I like about you.

1. Your Calzones! I mean Calzone’s they are AMAZING!

2. BSE (it’s the best!)

3. Doing the laundry. You do this a lot while I am gone and I do notice when I have clean pants for work. This does not go unnoticed but I need to tell you more often.

4. Your smile. I love when you smile and laugh. Especially when their my stupid jokes. I am really dorky and I am glad you like me!

5. I like when you call me at lunch when I am at work and you chat with me about how your day is going and the girls. It is nice you think about me during the day.

6. I love when you put perfume on or you shower and your hair smells really good.

7. I love when you scratch my back. It feels so good and it shows me you love me.

8. I like this year you have found some crafts you wanted to do and you took them on and they turned out fantastic. Taking photoshop and inputting the stencils and making the photos for my mom, the INCREDIBLE Santa sacks. They are awesome.

9. One of my favorites is that you are so nice to other people. I love how everyone knows you and loves you. Your so outgoing and I am so glad you are that way

10. I Love that you are married to me. I am so lucky to have you in my life. Thanks for all your hard work and effort that you do for our family. Especially that you do with the girls.

Love,

Tyson Gerber 

Christmas 2013

This year was low key and fun. The girls are still not getting the Christmas thing. Sydney woke up and seemed pretty uninterested in the stockings. When we finally got around to opening stockings she would focus on one thing and not want to move on. After stockings we had breakfast waffles and then cleaned the house. At 1030 we started opening our presents and Sydney opened her "little people" from Craigslist. We decided to have them open one present a day since honestly a lot of presents overwhelmed her. So tomorrow will have more presents.

I got really sick that morning. I felt chills and aches and soar throat. It was so weird. At 4 pm we cleaned up and then we had joe & Betsy Adams and the smith family come over for appetizers and hanging out. Sydney had a hard time playing with the other girls. She was pretty dramatic all night. Everyone left at 7 pm and the girls were in bed at 8. We were tired but happy with the day. 

Oh we also successfully made a photo booth wall and took pictures. They turned out awesome.

Overall Christmas was fun but man the sickness got  me. More on that later ...

Oh London

She's been cutting teeth and being so sad and fussy. I even took her to her doctor because I was afraid she had a near infection. Nope. Just teething. 

Morning are best but afternoons are rough. The things that seem to help are cold apples, veggie sticks, frozen Binkies and Mortrin. We love you London. 

Christmas Eve

We headed to the scottorns from 3-7 for Christmas Eve. Melissa made oyster stew, skillet lasagna and her famous cookies. Tyson and Jon played video games with Alec and mya. Kayla played with London and Sydney hung out with Kerynn. It was a fun time. I love how relax it all feels. We headed home and out the girls down. After we wrapped presents and watched prep and landing movie.

Don't quit on what works

So I feel like ii have been In a rut. It started right after December and honestly it might have to do with me getting back on birth control but that's another story. Christmas time has never been super exciting for me.  I never celebrated it growing up because of being Jehovah witness, then I came here at 12 and never got to believe in Santa, and then my mom worked every single Christmas since I could remember. Honestly I never allowed myself go get too excited because I knew it would be a disappointment. Fast forward to me being 30, a mother and wife. Christmas still leaves  a small a numbness to myself. I just don't get too into it. I thought maybe with kids - but the girls are so small they could care less. I love having the tree up but then everything else just makes me sad. 

Tyson and I were talking about it and he said "what can I do to make you happy" and I said it was not his job to make  me happy. I make me happy. 

I got on my knees today and pleaded and shed tears. I asked my Heavenly Father for help and forgiveness. I just felt like we were very far away. I count my blessings at night, i turn to positive thoughts when I feel like I'm dwelling on bad ones, I have a simple life so I can hold, rock, read, play with my girls. I know I'm doing a lot of things well but this life is a test. Five more days to go. The one thing that I can honestly is how grateful I am for Tyson. He is my constant. I get so easily frustrated with him but luckily I can also recognize just how much he means to me almost just as fast. 

So my goal for the next couple of weeks is to keep trying and keep smiling and keep looking for a way to serve others. Like Sarah Bugarin once said " when life gets hard, don't quit on what is suppose to be helping you" don't quit on what works - yourself and the gospel" 

Those words hit me so hard and have been repeated mantras the last two weeks. So here to not quitting and here's to keeping on the going. 

Playing

Yesterday we met Tyson at a park before he was to appear in court because he was subpeonead for a case at ESS. The court appearance was short since the girl got bail. Anyway, it was super fun yo see him midday. After we came home, I walked and cleaned. After the girls were playing after naps and I saw this - Sydney playing " if your happy and you know it clap your hands". She loves it when London joins in. 

Sweet London is so easy going and she adores Sydney. It's 5 days before Christmas. All the shopping is done and I have been so happy that it's been such a simple season. Most days it feels the same as any time but we love to put on Christmas music. We are still planning our 2nd annual appetizer party and are excited. 

This week I need to do laundry and then work on our laundry room which has become Tyson's computer central. Usually I am all over it but I've been slightly lacking motivation for such a big project. 

Ten Months

Weight:
Height:

1. You got teeth. Your two bottom ones came up at the same time. You had one bad night but other than that you did really great. You did lose your appetite. You seem to be thinninng out.

2. still no crawling or pulling yourself up but you actually do great at tummy time. I have seen you go backwards and you can turn yourself in a half circle but no movement yet. If I stand behind you you push on my arms to move

3. You love playing peek a boo and giggle like crazy when we do a puppet with you. Sydney loves to "do" one for you.

4. You babble babble babble. It sounds like you say "babababa" and "mamamama".

5. You sleep great. Go to bed around 730 and wake up at 720. We can give you a morning bottle in your bed and then you put your binkie back in and chill in your crib for another half hour

6. You love to grab faces, specially noses

7. You  like bread, oranges, green beans, puffs and brown rice

8. You kick your legs like crazy when you are in your high chair.

9. You started laying on my chest while I rock you to sleep.  This dosent happen very often since Sydney loves to come in but when it does its an amazing experience to feel your little body next to my heart. I cry alot when I have you there.

10. You started throwing food out of your high chair. I can't believe we are  starting this phase again. lol

11. You smile so much and are so chill.

12. You love your sister and are so entertained by her. You guys love playing with your little people and with your wooden food.